Ways to Annoy People
There are as many different ways to annoy people as there are, well, people. And tiny, insignificant things can turn out to be just as irritating as major annoyances. Ever wonder if your little quirks or big pet peeves annoy everyone around you? Check out these ways to annoy people and see if you recognize anyone you know. But don't be surprised to find out that the most annoying person you know turns out to be you.
Instructions
1. Answer every question with a question. What do I mean? You don't know what I mean? Are you sure? Are you kidding me? Know what I mean?
2. Sit next to someone when there are plenty of seats available. For example, you're at the movies. There are three people in a theater with 100 seats. When you arrive, head over to one of the three persons already seated and plop down right next to him or her. When that person turns and glares at you, then you'll know you're annoying.
3. Touch food as if you're going to eat it, then change your mind and leave the food for the next person. This tactic works especially well at a family dinner where food is passed around on a platter. Put your hand on a roll. Say, "I really shouldn't." Then pass the platter to the next person. If you really want to be annoying, use this tactic several times at the same dinner table with the same platter of rolls.
4. Never have money when you go out with a group of friends for an evening of fun and frivolity. Just to be on the safe side, leave your wallet at home so you can't use a debit or charge card. But don't forget your license. Just completely forget that you owe friends any money when they ask about it later.
5. Always be late and expect your friends to wait for you. Better yet, offer to drive and then be late. That way, your friends can't leave without you.
6. Say, "It doesn't matter," when you're sitting around trying to think of something to do. But when people make plans, and you finally do something, complain the entire time. Make sure you call the plans "lame," or "boring" under your breath. Suggest that you could have come up with better plans if anyone had simply asked.
7. Use your index finger to annoy people in interesting ways. Poke them. Tickle them. Point at them during a conversation. Dig food out of your teeth with your index finger, then examine the food before you flick it off in their direction. You can use other fingers and your thumb, too, but the index finger really is the most annoying digit.
8. Interrupt people constantly. Like every fifteen sec-Don't let them finish a-
9. Always "one up" everyone. If your friend has met Madonna, then tell her about the time you met the Pope. If your classmate wins a scholarship, mention that you've won five scholarships and a grant. If your spouse was up all night with a bad cold, then make sure she knows you haven't slept in three years due to a herniated septum. And throw in your bad back, too, just for good measure.
10. Spread the joy of the Happy Face. Dot your "i's" with a Happy Face. Draw Happy Faces on cupcakes or on the beach. Make Happy Faces out of random stuff, like rice or rocks. Post comments with Happy Faces. If you really want to ramp up the annoying factor, animate your Happy Face. Nothing says annoying like a winking, dancing Happy Face.
